SposiamociBank details for a cash wedding gift: how to ask gracefully
Felice Caricati · · 2 minute read
In short
Asking for money as a wedding gift is common now, and in Italy guests often send it by bank transfer to the couple’s IBAN. It is still worth doing it discreetly. Put the bank details on the wedding website and not on the invitations. One short, sincere line, the account holder and the IBAN are enough, with no long justification.
Where to put it
The right place is the website, in a section such as “Useful info” or “Gifts”, where anyone looking for it will find it. On printed invitations, the website link or QR code is enough.
Anyone with the link can see the website. If you prefer, send your bank details privately to whoever asks.
What tone to use
One line, written without apologising. You don’t have to explain in detail how you will use the money, but guests like to know whether it is going towards the honeymoon or the new home.
Lines to start from
Use them as a base and change them until they sound like something you would actually say.
- “Having you there is the best gift. If you would like to help us get to our honeymoon, here are our details.”
- “We already have everything for the house, except the house. If you would like to give us a gift, you can contribute here.”
- “No gift list: if you wish, a little something towards our trip.”
- “Celebrating with you is what matters. For anyone who would like it, our details are below.”
The details to include
Write the account holder exactly as it appears on the account and the full IBAN, ideally in groups of four characters so it is easier to read. If the account is in only one of your names, say so, so nobody thinks they have made a mistake.
- Account holder
- Full IBAN
- A suggested reference, for example “Wedding gift Alex and Sam”
Gift list, bank transfer or both
If you also have a gift list at a shop, put both options in the same section. Some guests, often the older ones, prefer a present they can unwrap.
Frequently asked questions
- Where should you put bank details for a cash wedding gift?
- On the wedding website, in a section such as “Useful info” or “Gifts”. The invitation card only needs the website link or QR code.
- How do you ask for money as a wedding gift politely?
- With one short line, without apologising, perhaps saying whether it will go towards the honeymoon or the home. Below it, give the account holder, the IBAN and a suggested reference.